Just Some Advent Ramblings

I’m kind of terrible about the Christian calendar. I just don’t connect with seasons, I suppose. Maybe I just get into such a routine that one day doesn’t feel any different than another just because a calendar tells me I’m in a new season.

But I’ve been thinking about Advent a bit more than usual this year. I’m not sure why. I’ve just been thinking about what it is that the season is trying to call us back to: Come, Lord Jesus. We need you.

I suppose it’s one of those things that I, strangely, lose sight of. I lose sight of it even when it’s completely obvious, I think. There is a sense in which God calls us to be self-sufficient. We are supposed to grow up, to mature and become capable of standing on our own two feet. We are supposed to learn and apply knowledge, to gain wisdom and figure out how to live well. Proverbs tells us what to know. Hebrews chastises the church for its failure to mature. Philippians calls us to keep working things out.

This is where I’ve been for many years, I think. This has been my primary mode of functioning. But it’s not the only mode. We’re simultaneously called to recognize our limitations. We’re supposed to acknowledge that we don’t know enough, that we can’t fix everything, that we can’t stand on our own power. We are called to recognize that we need God, a fact that is somehow obvious and somehow easily obscured (particularly in our rather wealthy, technologically saturated society).

This is something I need to focus on this season. I do need God. Even when I don’t always feel like it, somehow I need to grab hold of it anyway. Maybe if I grab hold of it enough, it’ll sink in and I’ll remember my place in His kingdom. I must grow more self-sufficient, but I will never become completely so. In fact, I wonder if the more self-sufficient I become, the more I will somehow become dependent. Why not? God’s full of paradoxes.

So I suppose I don’t have anything particularly profound to hit on here. Perhaps it’s just an admission that this is where God seems to be drawing me at the moment. God, I need you. Always will.

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